What is N.
Who is N.
He is my ex.
Firstly though he is a monster..
What my bad dreams are made of..
He is the boy who promised me love, but only caused me pain.
He lied, he stole, he cheated.
Violent outbursts People ask me why I am so hurt.. What one defined moment caused this pain..
Was is the threat of rape, the emotional abuse, the pushing, the shoving.. The manipulation.. The theft.. The continuous jabbing of thorns in my side..
It was the constant lying.. The fact that he could look me in the eye, promising to be truthful but all the while the only words escaping his mouth were lies.. And extensive one..
From drink driving, to stealing, to sex, to drugs, to love..
How could he look me in the eye, tell me he loves me and then lie.. And act like it doesn’t mean a think. Like i don’t mean a thing. Like lying is just that simple, that easy
I was hospitalized last September, my medication, had stopped working..my cutting was out of control.. I was in a huge bout of depression.. It was terrifying..
I went into hospital scared and afraid, he would visit me.. Telling me he loved me and wanted our life to be better - to move forward and make something of our ‘love’.. It really helped me to get through..
It was about 15 days after I was released that he broke up with me, after he was caught stealing from my parents, after he admitted to be using drugs again and that he had been using for several months, he also admitted he hadn’t been taking he is required medication for months.. More lies, so many fucking lies… After he dumped me, tried to take my car and my cat.. He went on to tell how he hadn’t been in love with me for months and had just stayed for convenience..
I just think about all the times he swore he loved me and wanted a future with me, all the times he would hurt me, and I was sit in the shower crying, no sobbing.. He would come in and save me with his words and promises.. So convincing, so believable… Yet all lies..
N. is a monster..
He has a terrible record with women,
A record that includes physical, sexual and emotional violence.
N. is a compulsive liar, a thief and jerk
Some people warned me against him, I never listened.. I should have
I look back of this relationship, I can see the good moments, the moments I will eventually be able to cherish… But mostly I think of all the fights, the harsh words, the violence, the tears.. And I just want to forget..
another post about Nino Ormiston. Please reblog.